Ryuk's Plan
by thetricksterofasgard
Summary: Ryuk decides he wants to bring L and Light together for his own pleasure. He transports them to where else but the Black Order. Will Light be able to survive this whole ordeal? LXLight and Yullen. NO LONGER ON HIATUS
1. Yay for the perverted shinigami!

It was a normal day at the headquarters where we could see L and Light. In a fight. Again. L had sent the rest of the investigation team home as he had decided to have a rest day. Unfortunately, this did not apply to Light because of those dreaded handcuffs.

As we have seen before fights never work out when you are attached to the person who you are trying to attack. This is how both ended up on the ground with L on top of Light while the rest of the room lay in ruins.

The finders winced and scooted away. In front of them was Lavi hugging Allen with a very pissed of Kanda glaring at him. "Get your hands off my property baka usagi!" he growled as he launched himself at the retarded rabbit.

Lavi let go of Allen and began to run around the canteen followed closely by a pissed of Kanda wielding Mugen.

Our favorite apple loving shinigami stood chuckling having watched as both had attacked each other. "Hyuk hyuk what a nice little show. Now if only Light could figure out that it is obvious he and L should get together," realization suddenly sparked in his olive like eyes," Wait a minute oh Light I'm gonna have some fun with you." A perverted grin overtook the shinigami's face.

"Dammit Ryuuzaki why can't you get it through that sugar-induced brain of yours. I AM NOT KIRA!", shouted the frustrated Light.

"Light-kun resorts to violence to easily", spoke L in his monotone.

"Well that is only because you question me every chance you get hell you even asked when I was in the bathroom", Light glared at the panda eyed detective above him.

"One must take the enemy by surprise I was merely testing you", L explained.

"God, Misa was right you really are a pervert and why are you still on top of me get off!" yelled Light.

"I need to make sure you will not strike me once I release you. You are prone to attack once my back is turned."

"Fine Ryuuzaki I promise you I will not attempt any form of sneak attack on you if you will release me," sighed Light exasperatedly.

"How do I know Light-kun is not lying to me. Kira would try to make a false promise and than take me with my guard down", L said staring down at his prisoner.

"Oh come o-", Light cut off as suddenly a bright light appeared above them and seemed to be drifting closer and closer to them.

Both looked shocked up at it "WHAT IS THAT", Light girlishly screamed.

"Would Light-kun be kind enough never to do that again as it damages my ears", L said still completely calm despite the anomaly.

The ball of light started to engulf them and in a split second L drew Light in a protective embrace and with that both disappeared from the room.

"Oh this will be fun to watch", chuckled Ryuk,"hopefully if all goes as plan they will become a couple and I will get much more of those little shows they unintentionally put on." Wings sprouted from his back as he flew after the ball of light.

Just as Kanda was about to slice Lavi into ribbons a huge ball of light appeared and plummeted straight into the redhead. Allen ran to Kanda's side while hugging his arm. "Oh my gosh what do you think that was?" Allen questioned.

"Che how should I know Moyashi", Kanda grunted. Both looked on as the smoke cleared as they saw two bizarrely dressed males.

L and Light simultaneously looked up to see a strange whited-haired boy with a scar on his face and a angry looking woman with blue-black hair drawn up in a high ponytail.

Suddenly the white-haired boy decided to speak, "Whoa look Kanda they are both handcuffed together. Do you think they are one of those couples so obsessed with being together that they literally have to be by each other's side 24/7?"

Somehow Light just knew that he was going to be experiencing hell on this little trip.


	2. Makeout Sessions

**Here's a new chapter for you and as a warning there is going to be some intimacy in this chapter not lemon but if you don't like it than I guess you shouldn't even be reading this. **

"Alright, what happened? I swear if Kanda destroyed something again I'm gonna-who are they?" Komui rambled as he stomped into the room.

Kanda, ignoring Komui completely, picked both L and Light up by the front of their shirts and much to L's anger separating them from their embrace. "You two are gonna answer all of my questions unless you wanna be sliced up by my Mugen." Kanda hissed in their faces.

Allen sighed and wrapped his arms around Kanda's neck, "Kanda let them go. They're obviously not Akuma, in fact they both look even more confused than we are." He said lightly.

Kanda growled but let go of L and Light's shirts. "Does anyone even care about me?" complained Lavi who was still under the two strangers.

To say Light is confused is an understatement. He was freaking out. Apparently the supposed woman was actually A GUY. To top it all off L was acting completely out of character. The usually calm and observing detective looked really pissed off. The look he was giving this guy, Kanda I think it was, was absolutely murderous. It was like that time when L had run out of sweets and Watari was too sick to go buy more. Trust me you do not want to see a sugar deprived L.

Kanda _finally _seemed to notice that he was being glared at and he turned to face the detective. "What are you looking at Baka?" Kanda sneered at L. However, he just continued to glare (can he even glare) at Kanda and this started to really annoy the swordsman.

Meanwhile Allen was helping Light up of the ground. "Sorry about my boyfriend, he has . . . . . anger issues." Allen said while holding his hand out to shake with Light's.

Light forced himself to snap out of his freak out moment. 'Come on Light you need to stay calm' as soon as he collected himself he answered, "Oh no need to worry I'm alright". Allen smiled kindly and they both shook hands.

"My name is Allen Walker, nice to meet you."

"Yagami Light and my associate over there is Ryuzaki," Light politely greeted back. Suddenly he felt the handcuff chain start to pull his arm his eyes widened "Oh shit" was all he could say before he flew after L who had crashed into a wall.

Light was still disoriented as Kanda approached L who had quickly jumped back onto his feet. Kanda smirked and landed a punch at L who quickly kicked him in the stomach. Kanda growled and slowly unsheathed Mugen and a evil smirk grew on his face.

L's eyes slightly widened but other than that he kept calm which Kanda had to admit was impressive but unfortunately he didn't know who he was dealing with. Light looked up and upon seeing the sword he gasped in fear.

L quickly determined he would not stand a chance as he barely dodged an oncoming slash from Mugen. He pulled Light up and both of them ran as the angry exorcist followed closely behind as they ran all around the canteen (everyone else had already left as soon as Mugen was unsheathed)

"YU KANDA! IF YOU DON'T STOP RIGHT NOW THERE WON'T BE ANY SEX FOR A WEEK!" Allen screeched from the center of the canteen. Kanda came to a grinding halt, fearful, and hung his head in defeat. L and Light were grateful as they regained their breath.

As soon as Light was able to speak he turned to L furious "WHAT THE FUCK L! YOU HAVE BEEN ACTING STRANGELY EVER SINCE WE LANDED HERE AND NOW YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO DRAG ME INTO YOUR FIGHT!"

L wondered where Light had gotten all of that air from. When he registered the words he looked at Light with sad puppy dog eyes which made Light instantly stop his hormonal little rant.

In the background both Kanda and Allen had sat down with Allen in Kanda's lap and they were watching the scene unfold. Of course Allen had decided to eat popcorn, which seemingly came out of nowhere, and was trying to get Kanda to eat some as well. They both forgot about the other two as Kanda whispered "Will I really have to wait a week?"

Allen giggled "Of course no silly I just said that so you would stop fighting" he said turning around to give his lover a hug. Kanda growled and his grip on his lover tightened with his anger.

"Calm down" Allen whispered in his ear and then brought his lips against Kanda's. Immediately the anger was flushed from his body and he brought one of his hand onto Allen's head and deepened the kiss. He softly bit Allen's bottom lip asking for entrance which the white haired boy happily granted and Kanda slipped his tongue into the sweet, moist cavern he loved.

"You sure know how to get me to back down, Aren" Kanda purred seductively into Allen's ear. Allen shivered he _loved _when his lover said his name, the accent made it sound so much better.

As Allen turned back around both he and Kanda noticed that the other two had stopped long before. Light immediately looked away a blush increasing rapidly on his face. L unabashedly continued staring.

"Aishiteru watashi no moyashi" Kanda said while flipping Allen over so his legs were on both sides of Kanda's waist. Allen was pulled back into a kiss blushing heavily and wrapping his arms around Kanda's neck. They soon parted and Allen rested his head on Kanda's shoulder and closed his eyes while his lover ran his hand through his white hair.

Light turned and made sure the make out session was over still sporting a blush. L still staring at the two had become jealous at their strong bond.

'Maybe it's time for me to make my feelings towards Light-kun more obvious' he pondered. He then turned to face the teen to admire his beauty. As he was staring an idea popped into his head.

Light was staring at the two relaxed lovers 'I wish that I could have someone like that close to me. Misa is too wild for me and to tell the truth I am not really attracted to girls, all the ones I dated never have I had a single feeling for. I only dated to keep up appearances I mean how would my family and friends react to knowing that I am gay." He thought sadly.

Movement was felt from the chain and he glanced to his side to see L advancing with a weird look in his eye.

"Um, Ryuzaki what are you doing" Light said nervously as the detective invaded his personal bubble. However, he never received an answer as L closed in on him and gently pulled Light into a kiss.

**Heh cliffhanger *evil grin* **

**Wow there was a lot of yelling in this and you got to see Allen and Kanda having their moment. Also don't worry Ryuk will be in the next chapter I just didn't know where I could put him in.**


	3. Weird Eating Habits

Ryuk's Plan Chapter 3

L stood there marveling the kiss; the feeling of Light's soft lips against his was heaven, the only problem being they weren't moving against his.

There was a sudden clapping that could be identified as coming from Allen who was smiling gleefully "WOO another make out session! God we are good." Kanda just sat there but you could see a slight smile on his face cuz this scene is hot.

But anyway, Light's mind was trying to process what was happening. 'L, the man who suspected him of being a mass murderer and was constantly harassing him about it, was freakin' kissing him. So of course her responded accordingly: "AHHHH!" Light shrieked and fell on his butt.

Allen started laughing at him until a strange girl with long hair put into pigtails walked in. She walked up to Allen looking confused "Uh . . . who are they?" she questioned.

"Oh, hi Lenalee. That is Light the one with short, copper hair and that is Ryuzaki the one with black, messy hair. They fell out of a huge ball of light" Allen explained as if it was a completely normal occurrence while simultaneously snuggling closer to Kanda.

"Oi, Moyashi. If you wanna sleep so bad then sleep" Kanda said to his yawning lover. "Ok" he replied and promptly fell asleep.

"Oh, Kanda tomorrow Komui said he wanted you and Allen to report to him tomorrow for a mission. He wants you to bring those two also" Lenalee said before walking over to said people.

Kanda raised an eyebrow but just shrugged. He stood up hoisting Allen up so he was against Kanda's chest and his legs were wrapped around the swordsman's waist.

L had offered his hand to Light who refused it and got up himself while avoiding looking at Ryuzaki, instead he turned his gaze to Lenalee who was approaching.

"Nice to meet you my name is Lenalee" she shook Light's hand who gave her a charming smile. 'Oh, he's pretty cute' she thought while blushing. She turned to give L a handshake but he just looked at her coldly and she awkwardly brought her hand back.

Light was clueless to why she was blushing but just decided to ignore it. Apparently he's very ignorant about these things otherwise he would notice that L looks at him the same way she just did.

"Well I need to go. I hope I'll get to see you tomorrow Light" she said sweetly. Light nodded "I'm sure we will see each other". She grinned in response and left the canteen.

"Hey baka panda and baka uke" Kanda called over "Come on I need to take you to the rooms err room you will be temporarily be staying at" he explained while looking at the handcuffs oddly. 'Che, it's none of my business'.

Light nodded and L looked at Kanda with an angry look but followed behind Kanda anyway. They soon reached their temporary room. "Allen and I will come by in the morning to take you to Komui in the morning" Kanda said in a low voice so he would not wake Allen.

While he was walking away he gently rubbed circles on his lover's back. 'Wow he is bipolar' Light thought back to when he was trying to mutilate L with his katana. It must only be Allen who can calm him down'

Both L and Light heard a sleepy 'Good Night' they turned back to see Allen waving at them sleepily with a lopsided grin before disappearing behind a turn.

L opened the door to the room and the both looked around there was a wardrobe in one corner of the room and a queen-sized bed in the other. "Well we might as well get some sleep" Light said climbing into the bed in his clothes not comfortable with undressing when L would be with him. He was kinda worried about being molested due to the kiss.

He looked up to see L still looking around. "What is it?" he questioned.

"The room is lit by candlelight" L said thinking. "You shouldn't worry about it now just get some sleep" Light said while closing his eyes. L climbed onto the bed staying in his normal sitting position. Light quickly fell asleep while the insomniac just started recalling the day's events. 'We need to get back home who knows what will happen in my absence. On top of that Light acting like the kiss never happened hopefully I didn't mess everything up' L thought sadly.

In the dark corner of the room you could see Ryuk grinning. 'Things seem to be getting interesting'.

Light woke up to sunlight shining in his face and a pounding at the door. He looked over to see L who had gotten out of bed seeing as Light was now up. They opened the door to see a happy as ever Allen and Kanda who was looking somewhat happy. "Good morning Light, Ryuzaki" he greeted.

"Good morning Allen-kun, Kanda" L said purposefully avoiding putting an honorific at the end of Kanda's name. Though he didn't seem to care much however Allen was looking at L in shock.

"YOU CAN TALK?" Allen screeched. "Moyashi quiet the whole order can probably hear you" Kanda said in an annoyed tone. Allen saw some freaked out finders pass the by "Sorry" he said with a guilty look.

"But seriously this is the first time you have said anything" Allen said.

"I did not have any important input so I felt no need to waste your time" he said in a monotone. They all looked at him strangely.

"Well anyway I've been wanting to ask what is the deal with those handcuffs?" Allen asked the long awaited question.

"Oh" Light said he had forgot people might find it disturbing "It's for uh personal reasons."

Allen had a look of realization on his face "Oooooh you like to do that too so do we" he giggled. Kanda just face-palmed at this while Light blushed, and L nodded enthusiastically.

"NO NO NO" Light said embarrassed. "It's hard to explain but it is NOT for sexual reasons. "Oh" Allen replied disappointedly. Kanda, Allen, and Light looked at L who was still nodding. When he saw everyone looking at him he started shaking his head "I meant no me and Light-kun are not sexually intimate". The others just sweatdropped.

"Well anyway lets go get breakfast" Allen said overly excited while grabbing Kanda and Light's hands and running down the hallway to the canteen. Poor L was forced to run so he wouldn't be dragged along the floor because of the handcuffs. When they arrived at the canteen Allen finally let go of his death grip on Kanda and Light's hands, L walked to Light's , he was not at all out of breath despite how long a distance he had to run.

"Good morning Jerry-san!" Allen exclaimed as he ran towards the line. At the sight of Allen, everyone in line let him go first so that the human black hole could get his food.

"Good morning sweetie, what can I get for you today?" Jerry asked with a smile.

"Moyashi let these two baka's get their food first." Kanda said flatly motioning to L and Light.

"Oh don't worry about us, let him go first." Light said with a smile. Kanda 'che'd' and mumbled a 'whatever' before letting his lover get his food.

"I think I'll have twelve omelets, ten French toasts, forty peices bacon and hash browns, and for dessert fourteen mitarashi dango." Allen listed off with a smile. Light gaped; L remaining indifferent why should he question people's eating habits? Kanda went up and ordered is usual soba noodles. L stepped up and was about to state what he wanted when Jerry shouted.

"Oh my gosh! New exorcists? Allen why didn't you tell me?" Allen looked up with a piece of bacon in his mouth. He quickly swallowed.

"They aren't exorcists, they're just here temporarily." He explained,

"Oooh~ Well then order whatever ya want sweetie!" Jerry exclaimed happily.

"Very well. I would like a strawberry shortcake, coffee with twenty sugar cubes and a banana." L ordered.

'Why the banana?' Everyone thought. Allen decided to break the silence.

"Why don't you order now Light." Light walked up as Jerry was handing L his food. "Can I please have a yogurt?"

"Is that all you want" Light nodded "but with that eating style you'll waste away."

"I'm fine really." Light said. Being a very healthy eater. Jerry looked like he wanted to say more but decided to just give him the yogurt. 'Does everyone have a weird eating style?' the cook thought.

Lavi walked into the room and spotted his favorite 'little brother'. "Moyashi-chan~" Lavi yelled as he glomped Allen.

"Ahh! Lavi!" Allen exclaimed. Kanda growled and then Lavi noticed Light who was looking at him with those adorable eyes of his. "Aha~ there are two uke's!" he exclaimed while glomping Allen and now Light.

While he was on top of them L and Kanda were getting mad. They looked at each other and decided on a temporary alliance, both wanted the rabbit **dead**. Lavi soon noticed a murderous aura and turned around to see Kanda and L. To avoid disembowelment, he quickly let go. Both uke's got up the redhead reminded Light of Misa and causing him to shiver.

"Allen! Kanda! You two have to go to Komui's office right now. Bring them too." Lenalee called while passing the canteen. Kanda sighed and began to drag his lover away from his mitarashi dango. "Kaaandaaa~ I wanna finish my dango!" Allen whined.

"Come on baka panda, baka uke." Kanda said still dragging Allen.

"Have fun on your mission you guys!" Lavi yelled (completely unnecessarily).

"Why did we have to come too?" Light questioned.

"I would say they need to gather information on how we arrived here so they can figure a way to return us to headquarters." L reasoned. As they arrived they saw Komui with papers everywhere, this triggered Lights OCD and his hand started to twitch with the want to clean up the disaster. Komui had his head on the desk and appeared to be asleep…again.

Kanda sighed, "Che. The bastard." He stalked over to the sleeping Komui and hit him upside the head. "Lenalee is getting married." Kanda yelled. Instantly Komui woke up with a murderous aura and many tools that seemed to come out of thin air. "Lenaleee~ how could you get married?" Komui wailed.

"Shut up idiot. Give us the specifics on the mission." Kanda growled.

"FIRST, you two!" he pointed at L and Light "how did you get here?"

"Well there was a ball of light that swallowed us up and we appeared here." Light said.

"That tells us absolutely nothing." Komui said dejectedly.

"I guess we will discuss what to do with you after the mission. Kanda, Allen, your mission is to collect two pieces of innocence and get rid of any Akuma nearby." Komui said in serious mode.

"Take these two so they don't cause any trouble, leave now." Both exorcists nodded and all four left the room.

"Moyashi, go pack your things and this time don't let Lenalee of that baka Usagi get to it." Kanda said. Allen shivered and remembered that perverted cloths that his supposed 'friends' had packed for him.

"Ok." Allen said cheerfully and skipped down the hall. While the two were packing, L and Light were forgotten.

"Hi Light." Both turned around to see Lenalee.

"Oh hey." Light said.

"So you two are accompanying Allen and Kanda on their mission?" Light nodded "Well I hope you're careful not to get hurt, it will be pretty dangerous for you but no doubt those two won't let you get injured. So be careful and you too Ryuzaki." Said person was ignoring her.

"Oh and before I forget, don't get on Kanda's nerves, he almost killed Lavi the other day. Well, bye!" Lenalee bounced away and the two looked towards the hall that Allen and Kanda had disappeared.

"Let's stay here and wait, Ryuzaki." Light suggested.

"I find it most intriguing that they talk about killing someone so easily." L pondered.

Light rolled his eyes "Lay off, you aren't going to find anything related to Kira in a place like this."

"True it seems we are going to lose much time for investigating, who knows what will happen while I'm gone." L said worriedly. "Oh come on, you should have more faith in the team." Light sighed.

"Sorry to keep you waiting!" Allen said as he and Kanda walked up to L and Light, his face slightly red.

"Are you alright Allen-kun?" L asked. Allen just smiled and nodded his head. "Follow us." Kanda said flatly before going to the dock. Allen ran and caught up to his lover who put his arm around Allen's waist and brought him closer.

The docks had a gondola and a finder, Kanda and Allen went onto the gondola. "Come one you two." Allen encouraged.

"The boat is much too small for five people." Light explained. Allen smiled an evil grin and sat on Kanda's lap. L got the picture and dragged Light onto the boat before sitting and forcing Light to sit on his lap. "R-Ryuzaki! What are you-!" Light began, but was shut up by L's face in no mood for argument. Kanda smirked and wrapped his arms around Allen's waist while resting his chin in the crook of Allen's neck. Allen in turn giggled.

Light blushed when L pulled him back so he was completely against L's chest. Light couldn't help thinking that it was comforting. Everyone stayed silent for the whole ride. The couples closed their eyes and relaxed.

"Um…sirs, it's time to get off." the finder said meekly afraid of Kanda getting mad as he tends to do. Thankfully he and Allen got up without a complaint along with L and Light.

"Ok we need to hurry to catch the train." Allen said taking off running. Kanda wordlessly followed after the white haired teen.

**Sorry for the ending; this chapter turned out much better than the last at least that's what I think. We wanted to think of nicknames Kanda would give L and Light, I'm sorry if they are bad. Anyway please read and review.**


	4. Update

**Sorry that I haven't updated in such a long time. **** I got caught up in something else and the story wasn't in my mind at the time. Also I'm no longer writing this with my friend so from now on it will just be me. However, I will try to continue on the chapter to I had already had some of it written out so I'll just correct some of it and try to finish it soon. Thank you to those who have followed, favorite, and written reviews for my story it really means a lot to me. ^.^ **


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